Become no one

I know life isn’t easy…I know we are all human and screw up and disappoint…but I also know that we all have hearts…and I know that inside of our hearts there is love…and I know that we crave love…from people…but I also know that we love to love…I know humans aren’t a mean race…I know that we don’t mean to hurt people…and I do know that humans care and hurt when they see the hurting…but here is what I don’t know…why is that these hearts of ours hold all this love and crave this love…and yet we have troubles showing it…we care about our own lives…we are selfish…we don’t share love…we don’t show we care…we don’t…we just don’t…now not all of us are like that…but most of you who read this…if there is anyone reading this…are guilty of it…you are the people you don’t like…you are the one who doesn’t share your love…you are…you just are…I have also been guilty of it…but on a daily basis I try not…I actually think about people and show them I care…but one thing I have learned is…you can acknowledge someone till you are blue in the face and sometimes they are just too busy with their lives and their desires that they will not show back that they care…so I am learning to let go…I am learning to say goodbye…and I am learning to let go of the people in my life who have let go of me…I am learning to not rely on people and just rely on God…and it feels good…but it’s a lonely road…especially in a city as lonely as this one…this city the people fill their lives with alcohol and drugs and sex but none of that will fill them…none of that will satisfy…this is a very broken and sad city…and I constantly feel alone because I literally have no one here…and sometimes my heart is sad…because I can pour as much love as I have out…but when none is coming to me you feel empty and I know God can fill it up…I know this…but sometimes…just sometimes it would be nice to hear it from a person….humans are a selfish race…and sometimes I just wish Jesus would come back already…sometimes I just wish…just wish that we would see these things that we have here on earth are going to be no longer…and I know what it means to give up possessions I sold everything to get here…I don’t have tv…or internet…and its been so great…because I am closer to my God…but I just wish I knew people cared…I am losing hope for the human race…and I am not just talking about the non-Christians…but I am also talking about the Christians…the ones who believe that success is their destination…the ones who are living in those big houses with their nice cars…the ones that think that is where God wants them…and yeah success and money is great…but I am happy to not have a lot of it…I am happy to be living in the ghetto…I am happy without the money that will soon be burned with the rest of this earth…and I just wish people would see it…I am putting my heart out on the line one last time…and I just want you the world to seek real happiness…without money and success…become no one…so that HE becomes someone.