Monday, October 30, 2006

A sign from Heaven

Peace...the crunch of the snow...the silence in the air...the stillness of the world...the beauty that shines through...the white...reminds me of Jesus...the snow is peace....the snow is my sign from my Daddy that everything is goin to be ok

Saturday, October 28, 2006

The Painting

Think of a painting...and how its not complete till the artist says its complete. A painting may have little details on it that no other person may even notice...the painter does. The painting is not like any other one can remake it but the painter. No one knows exactly what he has put into it but the painter. Or its truest secrets...a painting is extravegant. No two paintings are alike exactly. Each painting gives the person viewing it new ideas or new vision. Each painting gives off a new light...and if you look at a dont have the same opinion about it as another person. Some people see the good side of the painting....some see everything that is wrong with the painting...the way it looks or the way it was made. You need to look at the painting with the painters perspective with their eyes. Then you can see the "real" painting. As the painting gets older it gets appreciated by more people..and has a higher value...the painting is understood. Look at the painting and look at it with an open mind and you will see its true beauty.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006


Standing here at the edge of this cliff looking down...should I jump? Or should I put my trust in what was promised and step into the air? The ground looks and feels more comfortable...but is that the path I want to take? It's a long ways back down...I climbed so far up...the other side isnt that far away. God give me a sign show me I am me the way. Where are you? It's begining to rain...dark clouds are rolling over the sky...I need to make a decision...look there is an eagle. Flying above the storm...he is safe...and so I will be as well...I will be safe. Here it goes....I took that step...I am now in the air walking across to the other side...I see its soo green and beautiful..its what I have dreamed of...its the promised land...but wait...something is stopping me...what could it be? It looks looks I am in the way..I cant move anymore...why am I doing this to myself? What can I do to get there...I look around to see what I can do...I am sinking in the air I need to drop somethin...I need to drop...distrust...control...fear...fake security...and confusion. Look I am walking again...wait....what is this...I see temptation...alcohool...drugs...lonliness...fear...and sex. They are ugly and look like a monster...with its black look and horns and face that looks melted...I need somethin...I need to fight it...I pull out my sword. They are still there I need help...I call on my maker...come help me Father....come save me...they disapear. I can keep walking now...will I ever get to the promise land? I keep on walking...

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Great Weekend

Have you ever had those moments in life where you forget there is a "real" world? Well thats how my weekend was...the entire weekend I felt like I didnt have a job or "real" was great fun...I have this new group of friends now and its awesome and they make me happy and I feel different around them then I do around my other friends...I have had one of those thinking weekends dont worry its been good thinking...I have been looking at my life and seeing how different it different it was before the summer and where I am now...when I sit and think about it...its incredable...I love it...God gave me these people and it feels great to throw away the masks for once and not use them...I feel great bein myself...I love my new friends and I have broke down some walls and it feels awesome...its like nothing else matters but the moment when I am with these new friends and I feel like I have known them forever...its awesome I am really tired so I cant think right now....but thats just somethin that has been on my mind...I am goin to write more just later so this is all for now...

Saturday, October 21, 2006

My new life

Well I am satisfied...but not getting comfortable....with my life. I am happy a real happy for the first time since I came home from the ranch...I have new friends....friends who are there like the people at the ranch...I have new family...they are awesome...I love it...I can be myself and not get made fun of for sayin somethin stupid...I can throw away the masks. But like I said I am not gettin comfortable because there is always more...God always has more and you should never get comfortable with your life things change in a drop of a hat. I am glad that I went back to Vibe and I am glad that I am getting back into the life of my church....because I have been neglecting that but I am back...Nikki is back but its a different Nikki...I am back into believing in the things that God has for me and dreaming even bigger then I have ever before...because this is the year...God told me that before any one else ever said here I go the world changer that I am...I am goin to MY world and change it...I am goin to show people you God I am goin to play for your team God and I am not goin to quit because thats not who I name is Nicole Nadine Andrews and I am not a quitter...I am a conquer....I am goin ro fight but I am goin to use supernatural strength from God I am goin to use His power and He is goin to win through me...ha ha I love it...I am goin to stop rambling before I start crying but life is good...

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Frustrated Child = Godly Revelation

Ok so those of you that dont know children I will set the scene...picture a child that is around the age of two...this child is trying to get a toy unstuck....he tries every which way...and turns a few times...meanwhile the adult is standing back watching the child....finally the child is getting upset and frustrated and the adult comes over and asks the child do you want help?...the child is screaming and throwing a fit and the adult gently takes the toy turns it once and its free....the child smiles and gives the adult a great big hug...and the adult says next time before getting upset just ask for my help. Now you are wondering why I told that story....its because thats how God is...expecially in my life....He stands back and lets me do it on my own...and then I get frustrated and want to scream He then says do you want my help? I look for his help and He says next time can always ask me for help dont be afraid...God wants to help us but we decide to play God a lot of the time and do things on our own...and thats not how He made us...He made it so that we would need His would be a lot easier if we just called on our Heavenly Father who is waiting with arms open wide...thats a hard lesson for me to learn considering I have done things all my life on my own..but now its time...its time to give the keys to God and let is the time...

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Career Change

I am done...maybe I am not called to work in a daycare. Yes I know I have only been doin this for three years...I am tired and tired of bein tired...I even went to bed at 8:45 last night and am still tired. My job is exauhsting...I also dont know how to spell....I want to do a different job like a sleep expert or somethin where I can do nothin...Today I got a weird phone was from a University asking me if I was still interested on their school....I havent applied to a college or university in over a year so thats weird...but maybe I should go back to school...I dunno...all I do know is I am tired of my job and want to quit really was it I had it...I am done...maybe I should call in sick I wont do that I more responsible then that...but serouisly I suck at my job...I am no good...I almost started crying right in the middle of the room today I did get upset and everything went blank and the kids were callin my name and I was like a zombie...they dont need that they need someone who can keep it together...I cant I cant give them what they need...the deserve someone better then me...even tho today people said I am good at my job and those kids love me...its not true I am not good at it...I am done I know I said that already but for real...I cant do it....I want to do my first career choice...Graphic Design that sounds much more appealing to me right now...well thats my rant for the to you all soon.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

It's are my thoughts

Ok now its 1:18am and yes I do have to work in the mornin but things are on my mind and I need to let them has anyone ever seen the movie The Guardian well I did tonight and let me tell you it was a great movie...remember how much I like V for Vendetta well I liked this one that much if not more well I dunno but I liked it a lot...anyways there were some great lines or well I got revelation out of this I do with a lot of movies...I think its cause I like movies and thats how God's goin to get my attention...anyways so I have mentioned before in my blogs about watching who you are to people and do as Jesus would cause you may be the only Jesus they know...well I have another challenge for you...would you put your own wants and desires aside so that someone else can have theirs...would you save someone else's life only to lose yours....well thats a tough one....and it got me thinking...someone in this world is waiting for you to be their may be that they need groceries or a ride somewhere...their rent paid or a coat...I dont know what it is...I dont know who it thing I know for sure is that God gave us the power to help others and God wants us to be like do as He would...dont turn your back...what breaks my heart the most is the broken families I see and children not having enough that really breaks my heart and I want to cry and scream...but thats not goin to do nothing I need to stand up and bring people into their many people in my life have grabbed me and pulled me up levels they helped me and now its my turn to give people what God gave me...and thats a future...I should not be alive today with things that I have done but I am cause I have a future....I remebered a time in my life when somethin was spoken over me...somethin amazing and I see it come to pass as I talk right now...a e-mail came to me tonight reminding me of that word somethin I needed know who you are...I am growing and I have changed tons...not just a little but lots...and I am goin to keep growing..I dunno if this blog makes sense to any of its readers but this is where my mind is so enjoy...

Sunday, October 15, 2006

My glob...I mean blog

Life is interesting...and it is always changing...I like change but what I dont like is too much change...I dont know where I am goin or how I am gettin there or what speed I am goin at...its like my spedometer is broken...I dont know who I can trust what I can say to people and who are true friends...heck sometimes I dont know who my friends are...those of you readin this that I do hang out with dont take offence...its just me the way my mind is dumb at times...I know you guys are probably sick of me and my complaining cause I do have a good life...and there are people worse of then me...and I know you guys hate this part of me...but I am goin to seem more distant to you guys right now...cause I am lost in thought and I am afraid to open up...and I dont want to open up...only to a select few...the rest of you will only see as much as I show you...dont worry about me its pointless...cause I will always let you down...dont waste time on worrying not worth it...Well I dunno what else to I am goin to do somethin...other then bein on the comp...maybe think some more...

Saturday, October 14, 2006

I love this kid

Isnt this kid cute...he is my brother...I really like this picture and wanted to share took me forever to get a good one of him but I did I am excited....thats all I really have to say so yeah by for now.

Thursday, October 12, 2006


Screaming children, complaining co-workers, long days, poopy diapers, crying, grumpiness, throwing tantrums, hitting, biting, pinching, climbing, yelling, falling over like jello, and just being defiant...those are the words that describe my week. Dont get me wrong I LOVE my job...and I LOVE those kids but some days its just rough and thats my week...I am tired and I want to throw my self to the floor and kick my feet and say no and scream and cry...I cant do that tho cause it would look afull funny if my 23 year old self did I have to dust off and keep goin...and thats I said before there has to be more then 9-5 mon-fri job there has to be...I cant live my life bein so exahusted that I dont want to do anything....I come home and all I want to do is sleep...but in reality I dont like sleeping...there is a reason for that but I am not tellin the world...sleep is not my friend...anyways I just wanted to tell my blog and its readers about my week of work...tomorrow is friday and thats exciting...and last night I had a good talk with a good friend...thanx know who you you tons....well I gotta go...Nikki Out!

Sunday, October 08, 2006

New Season

<Thats my new bible I love it!

Jeremiah 1:4-11 (English Standard Version)

4Now the word of the LORD came to me, saying,
5"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,and before you were born I consecrated you;I appointed you a prophet to the nations."

6Then I said, "Ah, Lord GOD! Behold, I do not know how to speak, for I am only a youth." 7But the LORD said to me, "Do not say, 'I am only a youth';for to all to whom I send you, you shall go,and whatever I command you, you shall speak. 8Do not be afraid of them,for I am with you to deliver you, declares the LORD."

9Then the LORD put out his hand and touched my mouth. And the LORD said to me, "Behold, I have put my words in your mouth. 10See, I have set you this day over nations and over kingdoms,to pluck up and to break down,to destroy and to overthrow,to build and to plant."

11And the word of the LORD came to me, saying, "Jeremiah, what do you see?" And I said, "I see an almond

As I was sitting in church reading this verse and listening to the speaker I thought and it was good thinking....I read ahead in the bible while they were speaking(I cant help but read ahead its such a great read) and it came to verse six and said but I am only in my youth God said tho do not look at your age...for I have called you...thats pretty much what it says...but I put the verse up so you can see for yourself...God said I have said go and so you will go into your doesnt matter what the world says about are goin to do what God says about you...yeah thats just somethin thats on my mind and got me thinkin about my own life and my own I have favor there and how I am only 23 but they treat me like I have had much more experiance they act like I have been there forever...its actually still all a dream to me but its people are eating their turkeys and hangin with their families...and not realizing how thankful they should be...Thanksgiving has always been a great time for me I think of everything I am thankful for...I am so excited to spend tomorrow my thanksgiving with my family whom I love its goin to be fun.

Another thing that has been on mind lately is somethin that I have noticed...lately all I want to do is read the bible and talk about God and talk about the bible. Well there is nothin wrong with that cause that is what I am passionate about and thats how life should be our lives should be so centered around the word of God that we will NEVER be able to stray from it....I havent wanted to do anything else...but it seems like its hard to get people to talk about the bible or they look at you funny cause you brought up God's name but our conversations should be centered around Him...He is the best...well this is a different Nikki then some know cause I never used to be like this...but I love talkin about what God has done in my life and others lives and you know its so great...anyways I cant stop talkin about God and I wont.

Well this was $1000 sunday and I sowed my biggest seed yet cause God gave me seed so I used it...and I am expacting increase in everything not just finances...but I believe I am already rich in love and relationships so I am expecting increase in finances because I am really behind in all my bills...again I might not have a phone soon unless I can pay them..but I rely on God to pay me so that I can pay my bills and today I sowed with expectation. Cause man does not pay my wage God does....I am a servent of God and I obeyed Him today and it was hard but I know He will bless me for that...well that was just another thing on my mind.

Wow this turned out to be a long blog and I thought I was havin a nap after church today...ha ha anyways Happy Thanksgiving to everyone...and I pray that you are all blessed and that God pushes you forward into your destiny...and that anything that is on me the peace and joy and love gets put on you guys and that you all can feel it...cause I love my friends...Nikki Out!

Saturday Well Spent

This was a great and takin pictures the way I like it...saturdays should be spent like this more often...I have some great friends and some good times...the pics are my msn mypace for you all to see....but here is a taste.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Title goes here

Ok so I havent posted in a bit and thats odd for me I post yeah I decided to post about my week. Or whatever pops into my head while I am writing this my week well my week has been interesting. I work and work and work...I am tired but its all good cause I love my job...but lets start with sunday. I went to church and ferg was here ohhh gotta love ferg...his sermon was stinkin amazing what he spoke about hit home. I love when that happens anyways on to monday...a stressful day of work...where I got vomited on and peed on yeah not a good day...then went to the leadership meeting at the DC with ferg again...great sermon again and a little peace attached...umm on to tuesday...crappy day...dealing with things that I shouldnt and decided to retreat into my cave...well it wasnt untill a good friend of mine told me to smarten up on wednesday and pretty much got me out of that I am not hiding in my cave. Thanx to a certian friend of mine a good one at that coughhazzardcough anyways...its now thursday and I had a super long day with work and two meetings after work...long day....anyways I am hopin this weekend is relaxing and nice considering its a long weekend and I love long weekends...and its thanksgiving which means good food mmmm I love yeah also means I get to spend some time with my friends...I like my friends...ummm yeah so yeah isnt it crazy when God gives you somethin just when somethin isnt it crazy when God brings a new friend into your life jsut when one leaves....I love it...I love it a yes that is my week I am tired now and cant think so I am leavin...Nikki Out!

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Another Poem

This is a poem that I wrote awhile ago that I wanted to share with the world...hope you enjoy

Can I sit here and wait for you?
While my heart is falling for you
Out of the corner of my eye I watch you
My heart falling for your smile
Can I sit here and wait for you?
God has put you in my life and I don’t know why
I try to get inside your head
As you keep everything a secret
Can I sit here and wait for you?
I show you that I am there
You don’t even notice
How many more times do I need to show you?
Can I sit here and wait for you?
I ask God to tell me
To tell me if I have a chance
Wonder what you are thinking
Can I sit here and wait for you?
My heart is saying yes
My mind is saying no
My God is saying nothing
Can I sit here and wait for you?
I am so confused
When are you going to notice?