Sunday, October 15, 2006

My glob...I mean blog

Life is interesting...and it is always changing...I like change but what I dont like is too much change...I dont know where I am goin or how I am gettin there or what speed I am goin at...its like my spedometer is broken...I dont know who I can trust what I can say to people and who are true friends...heck sometimes I dont know who my friends are...those of you readin this that I do hang out with dont take offence...its just me the way my mind works...life is dumb at times...I know you guys are probably sick of me and my complaining cause I do have a good life...and there are people worse of then me...and I know you guys hate this part of me...but I am goin to seem more distant to you guys right now...cause I am lost in thought and I am afraid to open up...and I dont want to open up...only to a select few...the rest of you will only see as much as I show you...dont worry about me its pointless...cause I will always let you down...dont waste time on worrying not worth it...Well I dunno what else to say...so I am goin to do somethin...other then bein on the comp...maybe think some more...

5 comments:

JP said...

don't think too much... I do that, and I get confused and throw myself into a whirl wind and that's not what God wants me to do. Same thing with you Nikki, and don't let whispers come into your head that we're sick and tired of you because of the struggles you go through - not true - this is life, and just because someone else's life might be harder than yours or mine doesn't mean that our hurts, pains and thoughts aren't worth anything -because they are. Keep your head up - remember God is in control of everything! Romans 8:28 - that's you!

Anonymous said...

I agree with Josh...true friends already know how we can be, and they accept us for ALL that we are. You are just "processing" right now, sifting through the thoughts that are in your head. The enemy loves to trip us up with reminders of thoughts we've had on being not good enough, or friendless, or whatever else might be your feelings. I have those days and sometimes it takes ALL the energy I have to fight those thoughts from coming and remember who I am in Christ. THAT is all that matters. Tell the devil to go back to hell and break off the lies he is whispering in your ear....You rock! (ps, I'm not worried about you, because you are a CAPABLE, amazing young woman)

Jelea said...

sigh...i almost wish i were there with you right now...almost...so i came upon this internet cafe...hahaha

Amanda said...

Hey nikki, i agree with josh and Christina...heck, Jelea too...minus the cafe bit..because i'm just here in my kitchen. BUT...seriously, i'm not sick of you, nor will i ever be. You're my friend girl. Cristina's right too..you're a capable woman of God, and you can overcome this. DOn't let little thoughts in your head take hold of your life...live life rather than think about it. (sometimes...haha...sometimes thinking is good...but not when its negative and causes you to be distant and upset.)
I love you.
you know you can talk to me...or just sit there with me. Either or. praying for you.

rachelle/shelby said...

dont think to much nikki..just like josh said...cause sometimes that when the devil gets us most confused and worked up about usually nothing...God sees your heart...and He will always be madly in love with you...you cant escape His love...how great is that?..fabulous! :) keep truckin..love you B.sis!...